Week #6 Cherishing Your Spouse

He Really Does Love Me 

In his talk, Our Perfect Example, President Henry B. Eyring gave counsel to husbands and wives, "pray for the love to want to lessen the load and soften the sorrows of your companion" and he then shared the story about his father and mother.  "I saw this in my parents’ marriage. In my mother’s final illness, the more uncomfortable she became, the more giving her comfort became the dominant intent of my father’s life. He asked that the hospital set up a bed in her room. He was determined to be there to be sure that she wanted for nothing. He walked the miles to work each morning and back to her side at night through those difficult times for her. I believe it was a gift from God to him that his power to love grew when it mattered so much to her. I think he was doing what Jesus would have done out of love."  

It was a gift from God to him that his power to love grew when it mattered so much to her. This one sentence sums up what a marriage can be. I saw this same power to love in my dad as I watched him care for my mom. In 1996, my mom was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. Through the testing process as the doctors were determining the problem, my mom worried about being a burden upon her family and of suffering as her mother had.  As my mom awaited the official diagnosis, she tried to distract herself from her sorrow and was outside working in the yard, when a florist delivered three dozen dark pink roses.  This was the first time my dad had ever given my mom roses, so the value my mom placed on this thoughtful act was significant and in that very moment my mom thought, "He really does love me!"   

That was the beginning of my mom's journey battling MS and the power of my dad's love continued as she battled MS for the next 15 years until her death. For most of those years, she fought to win the battle, but in the last few years of her life, MS took over—she loved to go for walks, but found herself in a wheelchair. She preferred to be independent, but needed help with basic needs. She was the one who always listened to her children's concerns, but instead we listened to her as she dealt with depression. She loved to read, but her attention span decreased. Through it all, my dad was there by her side—and he carried a heavy burden without complaining, and he loved her more and more even though she depended on him more and more. 

It's easy to fall in love when you are young and imagine your future together.  It's another thing to live life with its ups and downs and maintain a strong marriage, but true love is found in those moments when you value your spouse more than yourself and they know that you cherish them above all else. We can have the power to love. It is a gift from God. We can walk the difficult paths of life together and be able to say, "He Really Does Love Me!"